I tried something new with my makeup for my school’s senior scholarship night tonight! I love doing my makeup full out :)

Hi guys sorry I haven’t really been posting much about fitness lately but my life is all over the place right now! I kind of enjoy my random all over the place updates - they’re a snapshot of my kind at the moment and an overview of what’s going on in my life. Fitness is obviously an important component but that’s not all there is! I want my blog to be me - not just fitness me!

In about a month, I’ll be leaving for vacation! I’m going to a prom house with my friends for 5 days, coming home for graduation and then leaving for Europe for 12! I’m so excited you have no idea. The trip is through the school so I get to explore the other side of the world with all of my friends :) I have a queue set up with a good mix of funny stuff and fitness stuff and funny fitness stuff (my personal favorite). However, I probably won’t have access to a computer so don’t expect many personal posts while I’m gone (in Europe)!

Once I get home I have about a month and then college starts. It’s becoming real. HOW.

The reason I’m posting this picture is because in Europe you need appropriate length clothing to your most churches, meaning knee length skirts and shorts, both of which I don’t own. I bought this dress for the trip because it’s breezy when it’s hot out, I can just throw a shawl over my shoulders and it’s cute. It also was the perfect length which made my 5ft self EXTREMELY happy.

And for the fitness part of this post - check out dat shoulder action. My lifting has been paying off yay :3

Sometimes I sing

Our performance at  the awards show last night!

This theater program has given so much to me these last 4 years <3

Reppin’ my Hairspray crew today! We have an awards show tonight!

I dressed nice since the weather will finally be warm today!

Three things that make today swell:
1. NO MORE AP TESTS WOOOO
2. I put mousse in my hair and made it full out curly and volumous for the first time in a week. It makes me feel good.
3. Look at what my kickline shirt says on the back hehehehehehehe

~*Transformation midnight*~

I was browsing through my friend’s facebook photos the other day when I found this picture of myself when I was 15. I can’t believe how tiny I was! I remember that I used to weigh 102 lbs (I’m 5ft) but damn.

I first started working out when I was 14.  I did my Jillian Michaels workout video over and over again like it was religion.  I was careful with what I ate. In reality, I was probably under eating and over exercising, but I was overall uneducated on the topic. I just thought I was pretty cool because I was skinny. (Note: I don’t recall having any disordered habits, I just did was I thought was the “right thing”). 

I was a tiny little thing. I thought I was cool because I was a tiny little thing.  Being tiny equated to being cool in my head. I was also fresh out of my awkward stage, and after losing my baby chub and getting my first boyfriend (do you see that class ring around my neck? barf.) Being skinny was this whole new thing to me and I thought I was awesome for it. 

Thankfully I’ve grown out of that mindset.  I’m still “thin” ( I really hate that word. Can I say slender?! Or maybe just relatively low body fat percentage?), but not to the extent of the picture on the left (My odyweight is somewhere in the range of 120-130 lbs).  I have boobs and I have a butt (thank you squat god). I had to exercise constantly to maintain my skinny appearance  so much so that it began to become a chore to me.  My body is not naturally stick skinny like I tried to make it, but more pear shaped like it is now.  And I like my body the way it is. I lift, and I sincerely enjoy my workouts.  I don’t just feel sweaty and “thank god that’s over with” when I’m done, but I feel like I actually accomplished something.  I don’t eat 100 pack snacks all day because I don’t want to eat too many calories; I eat whatever the fuck I want because food is delicious and I enjoy it. 

The difference in the two photos is not just in body weight, but in self perception. On the left, I had somewhat of an idea of the person that I am, and I had some confidence, but I hadn’t really found myself.  I was, well, 14. Now, 4 years later at 18, I know who I am, I know what I like and what I want, and I love being the person that I am. 

PS Those shorts don’t fit me anymore because they can’t contain my butt. BOOYAH.

Is it Christmas or is it Christmas?!

Also lol at my dad in the background

What my morning studying for AP Stats consists of. Not too shabby.

I look kinda ripped?! Enjoying my confidence today :)

This is me and my prom date :D

Let this be known as the last pic of me before I lose my mind via AP tests

Also dat post bro bench day pump

Hello when did this happen